Ezi enyi m, Derek, na-eziga ozi-e, na-akpọ ma na-ezigara m ozi ụbọchị niile iji napụta m n'aka m Bachelor nri abalị Christmas. His wife, Anne, is a fantastic cook… gourmet cook. They want me to come over today (right now) for a beautiful dinner with their family. Christmas is a day for family, so I've always felt funny sitting down to break bread with another family. Though they continue to call (I'm waiting for the police to come any minute), I have chosen my dinner.
Maka ekele, ụmụ m ji m mee ihe ọchị, “Olee ụdị Pizza anyị ga-eri?” Ọ bụ naanị mkpali m chọrọ ịme nri abalị ekele dị egwu. Anyị nwere ọrụ! Turkey, nri, poteto, gravy, ugu achịcha, na-apụta, wdg Ihe niile wee zuru okè - na ọbụna toki bụ ịrịba - a nnọọ ooh Butterball.
Now it's Christmas and my kids are at their Mom's house. It's time for a Bachelor nri abalị Christmas!
Na 3AM nke ụtụtụ a, ka m na-enyocha ebe a na-ere ọgwụ elekere 24, achọtara m Bachelor nri abalị Christmas:
- Lay's Cheddar and Sour Cream Potato Chips… that's right folks, they put the dip on the chips so you don't have to waste time dipping. And they were on sale! Buy 1 get 1 free.
- 2 Cans of Campbell's Grilled Steak Chunky Chili. Nothing but the best!
- 2 Cans of Generic Diet Orange soda borrowed from my neighbor (I'm house-sitting her 3 cats)
- And Desert? A fine ACID Blondie cigar. (Found it in a zip loc on my desk… it's perfect)
Esere m foto iji chekwaa ebe nchekwa n'oge:
You guys may think I'm crazy to give up a gourmet meal for this… but add a television table, boxers and an alien special on the History Channel, and we've got a very, very, Merry Christmas for Doug!
Adịkwa Onye ọ bụla!